Pick Up Lines
Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.
Baby, you're so sweet, you put Hershey's outta business.
Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue?
Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you
are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to
Girl, you look so good, I could put you on a plate and sop you up with a
Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it?
Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn
Hey, don't I know you? Yeah, you're the girl with the beautiful smile.
Hey, I know you! You were Miss Maryland last year, weren't you?
I feel like Richard Gere, I'm standing next to you, the Pretty Woman.
I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a
pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
I hope you know CPR, cuz you take my breath away!
I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness.
I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?
I think I can die happy now, cause I've just seen a piece of heaven.
I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Just where do those legs of yours end?
Nice to meet you, I'm (your name) and you are...gorgeous!
So, what do you do for a living besides always making all the men
excited and warm all over?
Was your dad king for a day? He must have been to make a princess (or
prince) like you.
Was your father a farmer? Because you sure have grown some nice melons!
Was your father a mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned
Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good.
Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot.
Were your parents Greek Gods, 'cause it takes two gods to make a
What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
What's that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty. Here, let me get it
off. Hey, it's not coming off!
Wow! Are those real?
Ya know, you look really hot! You must be real reason for global
You are the reason men fall in love.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once!
You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You're making the other
women look really bad.
You look like my third wife. She: Oh, how many time have you been
You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
You should be someone's wife.
You're ugly but you intrigue me.
You've got to refer me to your plastic surgeon.
Oh my sweet darling! For a moment I thought I had died and gone to
heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought
Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Hey, You were great on Bay Watch last night!
If you have a chance to become anything on earth what would you want to
become?" [the answer] you: " well to me, I want to be your tear drop: I
was born in your eyes, live on your cheeks, and die on your lips.
Babe! you look so fine I could drink your bath water!
I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to
I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light
You're so hot you would make the devil sweat.
Baby, you so flat you make the walls jealous.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking
through my garden forever.
I bet you could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch.
I bet you could suck Lincoln's head off a penny.
Gee, for a fat girl you sure don't sweat much.
Excuse me.....Hi, i'm writing a term paper on the finer things in life,
and i was wondering if i could interview you...
If god made any thing better than you he keep it for him self.
Guy: Sorry, but you owe me a drink. Girl: Why? Guy: I looked at you and
There must be a lightswitch on my forehead because every time I see you,
you turn me on!
Damn, I thought "very-fine" only came in a bottle!
Your dad must have been retarded, 'cuz you are special.
Hey, how did you do that? (What?) Look so good?
Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
If you stood in front of a mirror and help up 11 roses, you would see 12
of the most beautiful things in the world.
Presents the person with a single rose and say: "I just wanted to show
this rose how incredibly beautiful you are."
I betting that you cannot wait until tomorrow, because I bet that you
get more and more beautiful every day.
If God made anything more pretty, I'm sure he'd keep it for himself.
You are so beautiful that I would marry your brother just to get into
You look like a cool glass of refreshing water, and I am the thirstiest
man in the world.
Are you a tamale? 'Cause you're hot.
You are so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine.
Most people like to watch the (i.e. World Cup, Stanley Cup, Super Bowl,
NBA playoffs, etc..) cuz it only happens once a year/every 4 years, but
I'd rather talk to you cause the chance of meeting someone like you only
happens once in a lifetime.
Where's your paper bag? (What?) Your paper bag to put over your head.
(Excuse me?) It's dangerous for someone like you to be out in public
with all of these horny people around. Don't worry, I'll protect you.
When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head
on the floor...so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance
Has anyone ever told you that you have Scandinavian hands? (Uh, no.) No,
of course not, that would be an incredibly stupid thing to say, wouldn't
Excuse me miss... Is your face so messed up because you fell from
Do you want to see a picture of a beautiful person? (hold up a mirror)
Do you bleach your teeth? 'Cause your smile lights up the entire room
like a candle in the dark. Let's go prove it.
Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to
Do you go the ocean much? 'Cause you smell like the CLAM!
Stop, drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire.
I'm sorry, but, have we met before? (No.) Oh, I'm sorry, I guess that it
must have been your mom.
Baby, you're so hot, you make the equator look like the north pole.
You're a babe, right? Haven't you seen the film?
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of
Even though the ugly lights are shining bright, you still look
There aren't enough "O"'s in the word "smooth" to describe how smooth
This is incredible. This is the first time that this has ever happened
to us. (What?) Each one of my 27 personalities found you cute!
If beauty were an hour, you'd be a second.
Wow, you have some sweet birthin' hips.
(Walk up to them and touch them) Thank God, I thought that you were only
If beauty were a grain of sand, you'd be a million beaches.
Is that your date, or did your brother get a new dress?
You must be going to hell, because it is a sin to look that good.
Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.
If it weren't for that DAMNED sun, you'd be the hottest thing ever
That's a nice watch [Thank you] Actually, that's a nice dress. [Again,
thank you] Come to think of it, everything is nice on you.
Did the Lord steal the thunder from the skies and put them in your
Are those implants?
Are you a bird collector? 'Cause you've got a nice set of hooters.
Excuse me, is that your perfume that you are wearing?
How is your fever? [What fever?] Oh... you just look hot to me.
I just got dumped, and I think that you could make me feel better.
(Walk up to someone and bite them anywhere) Person: What are you
doing?!?!? You: Sorry, taking a bite out of crime. Person: WHAT?!?!?
You: Well it has to be illegal to look that good!
You are a 9.9999. You'd be a perfect 10 if you were with me.
Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your
parents created such a beautiful creature.
When God made you, he was showing off.
Hey, don't frown - you'll never know who might be falling in love with
My ex-girlfriend used to call me Goldfinger.
If all the stars in the sky were summed, not even words that many times
stronger than "beautiful" could ever be used to describe you.
You're so hot, I bet you could light a candel at 10 paces.
How much did it cost? (What?) The surgery that made you so hot!
Are you a bad load of laundry? You make my pants feel two sizes too
If you were a laser gun, you'd be set on stunning.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porshe.
The drink: $6. The room: $100. The night with you?: Priceless.
Listen to this: my buddies over there said that I wouldn't be able to
start a conversation with the most beautiful boy/girl in the bar. Wanna
buy some drinks with some of their money?
You must be a high jumper, because you make my bar raise!
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you,
I'd have five cents.
Have you seen my enormous jar of "Penis Reducing Cream"?
You know at this angle as the lights hit your eyes [start fixing hair] I
can see myself and I look great." Then smile, and sheepishly say "just
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
You wet? I'd bet you are after looking at me.
You're so fine, I'd suck your daddy's dick just to get some of where
that came from.
I can't believe I've been hear the entire evening with all these
beautiful people and the moment I find 'The One', all I have time to say
is "good bye".
I had your sister last year, she sucked. Wanna defend your family honor?
This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.
I don't know you, but I think I love you already.
You look beautiful today, just like every other day.
Walk up and say, "Yes?" "What?" "Oh, my friend told me that you wanted
to make out with me because I'm the finest thing you have seen all
Are you an interior decorator? When i saw you the room became beautiful.
You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot
you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.
Ok, quick, you go in the toilets and get me some condoms and meet me
back here in five minutes... In the meantime I'll go and get you some
Scientists call me a medical miracle.
[You] Here are my keys [Other] Why? [You] Here's the key to my house, my
car,...and my heart.
You had better direct that beauty and femininity somewhere else, you'll
set the carpet on fire.
Why is it that every time you are around, my pants feel tighter?
When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll
think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the
day that I met you.
Is your name Summer? 'Cause you are as hot as hell.
Fascinating. I've been looking at your eyes all night long. I've been
looking at your eyes all night long, 'cause I've never seen such dark
eyes with so much light in them.
Fat Penguin. WHAT? I just thought I'd say something to break the ice.
You know that I think about you only twice a day? Once when my eyes are
open, and once when they are closed.
You're so flat, I don't know if you're walking forwareds or backwards.
Two words explain me when I'm not with you. Jergens Lotion.
How much do you cost? I've got a dollar, how much change would I get
If I had to choose between one night with you or winning the lottery...I
would chose winning the lottery...but it would be close...real close...
Is that a fox on your shoulder, or am I seeing double?
Will you be my derivative? I'll be the area under your curves.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I
could stare at you a bit longer.
Do you like pool, cause I've got the balls if you've got the rack. (or
Damn, Sugar, settle down. I'm diabetic.
You need $20 and a friend. Give friend the $20. Walk up to target.
Friend says, "You're right. Those are the most beautiful eyes I have
ever seen." Hands you the $20 and walks away.
So last night I had the same dream over and over - always the same
thing, but in a different location every time. I kept dreaming that I
was asking you out, but every time before you answered, I woke up, and
I'm dying to know what your answer was.
From across the bare you looked a little on the heavy side, but as you
got closer I noticed you were ugly too!
If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy
in my hand.
(If s/he is looking at you)You know, my mother always told me it was
impolite to stare... so what do you say we dance?
Do you have any sunscreen? 'Cause you are burning me up!
See these keys? Ya like em? I wish I had the one to your heart.
Excuse me I have a problem and I wonder if you can help me? (O.K. I'll
see what I can do. What is your problem?) I have every S.T.D. in the
book except for one and I think you can give it to me!
Do you have a twin sister? Then you must be the most beautiful girl in
Is that shirt Camel Skin? 'Cause I'm checkin' out your humps!
You could make a glass eye cry...
I think that your attractive and simply amazing from what I've seen so
far. Can I get your number and meet your personality.
All the other girls are just rough Drafts .... but i think you are the
Are you a hands-on-learner? Because I am, and I'd like to learn about
Way to go God!!!
If God had a refrigerator, a picture of you would be on it.
Your voice sounds like sandpaper grated over a cheese grater.
I bet your name is Jesus, because you look like you came from heaven!
You don't look too bad, I'm guessing you only got hit once in the face
with that sack of nickels, right?
Bitch, give me some of that disease!
You look so hot that I could cook rice on you!
You're hotter than donut grease.
You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
I spent over a grand on Viagra today, only to come here and see you and
find out that I donít need it after all.
A thousand painters working for a thousand years could not create a
beauty that equals you.
Did you know its a felony in this state to look that good, but if you
turn around I'll let you off with a warning.
There are only two beautiful girls in the world, and you are both of
Your good looks don't intimidate me. (Walk away)
If you could put a price tag on beauty you'd be worth more than Fort
Your eyes are as blue as the water in my toilet bowl.
Baby, you're so hot, you make the North Pole look like the equator.
You're so hot, I'd better smother you with my body before you burst into